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Beyazit Öztürk
avoids politically incorrect (PI)
Turkish humor, not wishing to risk his popularity as Turkish TV Presenter, Singer, Film, Stage, and TV actor
Beyazit Öztürk -- Popular TV Presenter, Singer, Film, Stage, and TV actor
Famous Türk Picture Series
In Turkey - Türkiye'de

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In Turkey - Türkiye'de

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The Politically Incorrect
Turkish Funnies 1

A sampling of mildly naughty funnies, cartoons, and comics --
from some of the paper publications of Turkey...

In Turkey - Türkiye'de

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Note:
The Turkish comics translations below are figurative --
to help convey the intended meaning of the funnies rather than
a word for word Turkish to English interpretation...

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Jeepers peepers...

Juvenile #1 to Juvenile #2: You jerk...
Are these the topless girls you were talking about?

Thanks to:
Le Man Dergisi (Istanbul) and...
Özge, creator of   'Juveniles'.

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The Lout -- Mea culpa...
The Lout's pal: Good God...I've never seen such an ugly woman in my life...
The Lout: That's my wife, buddy...
The Lout's pal: I'm so sorry. I didn't know. Please forgive me...
The Lout: You don't need to be sorry. That mistake belongs to me...

Thanks to:
Gözcu/Asabi Gazetesi, Gerçek Yayıncılık A. Ş.
(Mehmet Ali Yalçındağ, Owner)
and Volkan Atalay, creator of 'Maganda, The Lout'.
Ankara

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Elephant lust...
Refika, the female elephant: Not in front of the children, Refat!
Refat, the male elephant: (After disengaging and squashing the
watching human children...
) How's that?
Female elephant: s' fine..


Thanks to:
Le Man Basın Yayın Ltd. Şti.
(Erdil Yaşaroğlu, creator of 'Komikkaze')
Istanbul

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The Lout -- Too revealing...?
The Lout's neighbor: Look sir, I'm your neighbor.
And you have a right to make love to your wife every night, but...
how about closing the curtain when you go to bed...
My family gets tired of watching you night after night.
The Lout: What are you saying, sir?. I'm an inspector --
and I haven't been home for a week...

Thanks to:
Gözcu/Asabi Gazetesi, Gerçek Yayıncılık A. Ş.
(Mehmet Ali Yalçındağ, Owner)
and Volkan Atalay, creator of 'Maganda, The Lout'.
Ankara

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Accidental deflowering...

(Remembering nostalgically) 'Home Girl' says:
I lost my virginity as the result of an accident...

Thanks to:
Le Man Dergisi (Istanbul),
Gürcan Yurt and Mesut Ceylan, creators of 'Lombak'.

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The Lout -- Just keep walking...
The Lout's niece: Say, mom...
Is there any drawback in walking with a young man
in the park after dark?
Her mother: There's no problem as long as
you keep walking.
I used to go walking in the park
when I was young too...
But one day I stopped...And you're the result!

Thanks to:
Gözcu/Asabi Gazetesi, Gerçek Yayıncılık A. Ş.
(Mehmet Ali Yalçındağ, Owner)
and Volkan Atalay, creator of 'Maganda, The Lout'.
Ankara

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I'll show you mine, if you show me yours...

Home Girl: Thanks for driving me home Alaattin ...
Come on upstairs and I'll show you where I had my operation...
Alaattin: Oy!... OK...
Home Girl: Look, you can see it from here.
When I had the pains, they took me to the Insurance Hospital over there.
That's where I had the operation...
Alaattin: [does the 'slow burn'....]

Thanks to:
Le Man Dergisi (Istanbul),
and Can Barslan,
creator of 'Terelelli'
(Slightly crazy or nutty).

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The Lout -- Afternoon delights...
The Loutish Doctor: Do you have sexual relations during the day?
The Lout's patient: Of course I do.
The Loutish Doctor: With respect to these daily activities,
do you talk to your husband while making love?
The Lout's patient: No...I can talk to him if I want to, but...
at that time I'd have to reach over to the phone and call him at the office...

Thanks to:
Gözcu/Asabi Gazetesi, Gerçek Yayıncılık A. Ş.
(Mehmet Ali Yalçındağ, Owner)
and Volkan Atalay, creator of 'Maganda, The Lout'.
Ankara

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The Newspaper Reader...
The Newspaper Reader's wife:
Look hubby dear, I met a spaceman who says he's friendly.
We're off to the bedroom...
The Newspaper Reader:
Whatever... But if you don't mind, I'd like to read my newspaper!..

Thanks to:
L-Manyak Gazetesi, Şimera Basın Yayın Ltd. Şti.
(Censiz Üstün, creator of 'Tribal Enfeksyon'.
Istanbul

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The Lout -- The long count...
The Lout: Tell me frankly, darling...
How many men have you known before me?
...
...
You've been quiet for minutes, honey.
Why don't you answer me?
The Lout's lover: Wait, sugar, I'm getting mixed up...
I'm trying to count, ya' know...

Thanks to:
Gözcu/Asabi Gazetesi, Gerçek Yayıncılık A. Ş.
(Mehmet Ali Yalçındağ, Owner)
and Volkan Atalay, creator of 'Maganda, The Lout'.
Ankara

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The Smooth Talker...
The Smooth Talker
(after 'anointing' the wall and giving himself a 'strategic scratch'):
Lookee, Nurten...I'm writin' it down right here...
You're gonna miss me soooo much -- that you'll be back in two days...
The Smooth Talker's long suffering wife:
Ayeee...You are disgusting, Fadıl...

Thanks to:
GırGır Gazetesi,
and Metin Oktay, creator of 'The Smooth Talker'.
Istanbul

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The Lout -- Suicidal tendencies...
Old woman patient (on phone):
Can you tell me the surest way to commit suicide, Doctor?
The Loutish Doctor:
Shoot a bullet about four fingers beneath your left breast, madame.
Newspaper boy (the next day):
Extra extra, read all about it...
Old woman commits suicide by shooting herself in her
left knee cap. Extra extra.


Thanks to:
Gözcu/Asabi Gazetesi, Gerçek Yayıncılık A. Ş.
(Mehmet Ali Yalçındağ, Owner)
and Volkan Atalay, creator of 'Maganda, The Lout'.
Ankara (7 January 2001)

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The Loutish Doctor -- and his shy patient...
Pretty woman patient:
Dear doctor, I'm very embarrassed when I get undressed.
The Loutish Doctor:
If you're embarrassed, let's turn out the lights.
Pretty patient:
Where shall I put my under garments, Mr. Doctor?
The Lout:
If it's not too much trouble, you can put them right on top of mine.

Thanks to:
Gözcu/Asabi Gazetesi, Gerçek Yayıncılık A. Ş.
(Mehmet Ali Yalçındağ, Owner)
and Volkan Atalay, creator of 'Maganda, The Lout'.
Ankara (30 March 2001)

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The Lout's got Viagra rights...
The Lout:
Dear mister pharmacist, I'd like a [packet of] Viagra...
The Pharmacist:
Without a doctor's prescription, it's definitely not possible.
The Lout:
If I'd show you my wife's picture instead of a prescription,
you'd give me the Viagra without question...
[you'd acknowledge my right...]

Thanks to:
Gözcu/Asabi Gazetesi, Gerçek Yayıncılık A. Ş.
(Mehmet Ali Yalçındağ, Owner)
and Volkan Atalay, creator of  'Maganda, The Lout'.
Ankara (13 October 2001)
In Turkey - Türkiye'de

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Turkish movies, Türk filmleri
  • Essential Turkish Vocabulary
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